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Out of the 10 hookups 7 of them were out of pity. Most of em had just broken up. Or had been too fucked up to talk so they fucked with fickle emotions instead. You run after things you can’t have. He craved for music more than me and that made me run after him. He was crazy for this other girl when I was always there and of course I wanted him. This other one left his girl to be with me and I said no to him. It’s a circle of life. You fuck people over. Life fucks you over.


What kind of a friend lets his other friend walk from atrium to phase 6 in a city like karachi. I asked them for a ride home and they’re all giving me these pansy ass excuses about gas money and permission issues and not being able to stay out late. these people with their Mercs and their manservants, and their saturday drinking plans couldn’t go a little out of their way to drop me home and I told them you know what, its okay ill walk home, and they laughed at me, they were like bro its karachi, this is saddar- and I’m like, you really have the audacity to tell me that right now? and I walked- it took me an hour and a half and I was angry throughout the way, I was angry at myself for such poor decisions when it came to picking friends but my principals have always been above everyone, my dad used to say to me, sir kata daina lekin kabhi jhukana nahin. I’m not going to let some pansy ass grammar kid let me feel like I’m a fucking liability to them- i certainly have more pride than that- these kids don’t live in the real world, they think they have the best of both worlds. and unless you’re not living with your parents then you really don’t have much under your belt.
-July ‘12

The 2000s was the era where we’d see the same things everyday- and it looked like they’ll stay the same forever.
The Indian serials that didnt seem to have an end to them.
Musharraf’s regime didn’t seem like it was about to end anytime soon either.
School was the same bloody routine everyday.
Life had a set pattern to it.
And then now- there’s barely a day where things were the same as yesterday.
Mushy went into house arrest
The Indian soap characters are dead
And we’re struggling to keep up with school.
This is an era of not so constants.

I think that cow wants to be human. It wants to live long and smoke the joints.


While smoking THE joints.
You know that girl?
What girl?
You know the one with the nice everything except teeth.



Sometimes I feel like my life is a game of temple run. Running around in a wild jungle, collecting all the coins and bonuses, ducking past the obstacles but no idea what for.

That time of the year when everything is a blow to my esteem.
I need better ways to vent out whatever is going on with me.

I don’t need a person.